A Couple of Mopes

Our dogs are Grumpy…

Sad or grumpy would actually be understatements. They are gloomy, cheerless, poignant, distressed, if you will…

Pick one of the aforementioned adjectives and they could both take the place of “Grumpy” from Snow White & the Seven Dwarfs!

Logan, our hyper and always energetic Beagle, seems so melancholy… and Andy, our hyper-sensitive West Highland Terrier doesn’t know what to think. Andy just follows suit with whatever Logan, the Matriarch, does. They are a couple of mopes these days. We are not exactly sure, but we think they aren’t receptive to change. Logan basically shunned us for two days when we brought Andy home for the first time. Finally, she warmed up to him and now they are inseparable!

The other day, as Laura was casually lounging on the couch; Logan woefully hopped up onto Laura’s lap and just sat there like she was a breed that is about 20lbs less than she actually is!

Her expression was that of, “can’t you see how sad I am? Haven’t you noticed? What do I have to do to show you? I mean I can’t talk, so here… this is my SOS to you… Heed my notice master. I am sad.”

She stayed perched upon Laura’s lap even while we roared with laughter. It is on a very rare occasion that we allow our pups on the furniture and this was not one of those instances.

It was so out-of-the blue that we did not know how to react! It is absolutely shocking how protective and concerned our dogs have become in the past few months. They both follow Laura around as if they are waiting for her to collapse, or even, gasp, for her water to break! I certainly would not know what they would do, besides try and lick it up, if that were to happen!

How is it dogs are so aware of what is going on during pregnancy? I mean I know we have some super-intelligent K-9’s, but seriously? Do they know what is about to happen? Do they understand what we talk about when we discuss bringin Mauldin home? What if they think Mauldin is another dog? LOL!

Well, it will certainly be interesting to observe how they react when we finally bring Mauldin home… (that is, if he ever is BORN!)

Chicken Noodle Soup & Grilled Cheese

Tonight was one of those nights where we decided to stay in for dinner.

It was for more than one reason, okay basically just two reasons:

1. my wife, Laura, is still feeling a bit under the weather and 2. the weather has just been nasty and we didn't want to get out after getting home from work.

I thought it might be a nice gesture if I would offer to make our dinner tonight, since it was such an easy receipe. Although, I will say that when I offered I would of never thought Laura would take the offer, however, she said...

"Yah! That sounds great!"

So, I went all out, grabbed the apron, cheese, bread and two cans of cambells chicken noodle soup... Laura being so surprised by this went and grabbed the camera!

The dogs even took part, they were probably hanging around the kitchen because... dad never cooks and so they were hoping I would drop something!

Well, aren't I just a wonderful husband to cook my pregnant wife a wholesome and scrumptous dinner?

I think so!

What's that smell?

The past week my wife, Laura, and I have been putting up with our dog’s pungent stench. The disgusting odor is because we have not taken our Westie, Andy, to get groomed in the past few months due to two things, scheduling and budget cuts on the home front. Logan, our regal beagle, stinks just as much as Andy does, however, Andy, being white, causes his dirtyness to stick out like a smelly thumb. I have tried to mask their odor with febreeze pet spray, but to no avail, and under much protest to my wife for spraying the pups, I was stuck with finding another way to get this disgusting odor from our home. Not only does Andy stink, but he looks terrible too. We have weeds down the hill of our backyard and Andy insists on going through them and coming back into the house covered in sticky thorns that are close to impossible to get out of his fur, hair, what do dogs have? I don’t care he is nasty! Picture a cute white puppy with black thorns all stuck in his fur, face, butt, tail, legs, etc… So, last night, at about 6:30pm, Laura and I just started watching our recent Net-flix rental “X-men,” and were talkin' to Baby Skates my nose turned and I knew what it was...

(Please note: Picture was taken after said Bath)

"I'm mean really?" I said, "Could they stink anymore?"

I made the executive decision, we have to give them BOTH a bath.

“Well, you know I can’t,” said Laura with a you-know-what-that-means look.

Laura, being pregnant has caused her to not only be extremely tired, but her immunity is lowered and has contracted a virus. No, not like a horrible stomach bug, just a virus that makes her very congested and stick to her stomach. So, it was up to me and me alone to clean our dogs and free us from the pungent stench that has been plaguing our home for the past couple o’weeks.

“Andy! Lets go buddy, you know what is about to happen don’t you?” I said while leaning over the couch to find him snuggled up comfortably on the bed next to Logan. His face speckled with little briars that had fallen onto the hardwood floor to look like little dead black bugs… gross… I know.

“I will wash their bedding while you give them baths,” said Laura lovingly.

Oh how I would love to trade with her, but when I think about it, washing dogs and washing their bedding, makes me sneeze equal amounts.

“Okay,” I said while I trudged up with stairs with Andy in my arms stretched out so to make sure no stickers ended up on me.

After I had him washed, de-stickered and dried it was Logan’s turn. Logan wasn’t nearly as bad, but she is just a little big larger than Andy, so while bending over the tub and washing her with the personal shower my back started to feel a wrenching pain. A pain that would not end, “how am I gonna finish this,” I thought. “Man, I need to work out more, this is sad.”

The one thing about bathing dogs that I despise is when they decide to shake with water and soap all over them. You smell the wet dog smell and then it is sprayed all over your guest bathroom walls. Logan has officially made herself the queen of, wash me. She will stand and look at your like, “you missed a spot.”

Finally, after all the washing I covered her with a dry towel and held her next just to ensure she wouldn’t shake and spray her “so-called” clean body all over me and the newly cleaned bathroom. I got out Laura’s hair dryer and after about 10 minutes of puppy pampering we had two clean puppies with flea treatment included. Although, after they were cleaned, I had to go and take a shower myself, I think they transferred their stink to me! But, as you know, both Andy and Logan immediately returned outside where the stink originated. They love to roll around in the, sometimes, wet grass and weeds on our hill. (I have since called to have them cut by our yard guy, Jim.) Ugh… Well, atleast they don’t smell as bad as they did before!!! Makes you wonder what all the people on Survivor smell like?

Side note: Is it bad that we bathe the dogs in the same tub where the baby will take a bath????

Hmmmmmmm….

A Melancholy Pup...

The last few weekends, my wife, Laura and I have been super busy… and our weekends do not seem to be letting up anytime soon. Every weekend we seem to have plans. It looks as if we may have to schedule time to stay home! It would be nice to be able to spend one entire weekend at home resting, but, obviously, we are kind of a big deal! If we aren’t out-of-town we are helping with a garage sale, or at a birthday party, or a high school reunion or a wedding, etc… Will it never end??? Will Laura and I ever get to spend some time at home??? Our dogs seem to be noticing we are not at home as much. Our usually ever-so excited beagle, Logan, has been moping around the house in a “ho-hum” kind of way, as if she knows what is coming. I can just hear what she is thinking… “You are gonna bring something home, I can just tell! Last time you acted this way you brought home Andy…” But, of course, our feisty Westie, doesn’t seem to notice anything. He struts around like nothing is wrong… We are not sure if Logan is sick or just sad!

It all began this past weekend...it was the annual fall garage sale for our subdivision and, certainly, you do not think my sister and mom would miss that opportunity, do you? They are garage sale experts! They have garage-saling down to a fine art. Well, as Laura and I were heading out of town, to go to our nephew Drew’s 4^th birthday in South Carolina, we drove past some houses that had a lot of colorful articles outside in their driveway.

“Wow, look at all that stuff!” I said to Laura while stopped at a stop sign on Woodbridge Lane. “Look at all that baby stuff!”

“It looks brand new…What are you doing?” said Laura while she watched me pull out my phone to make a call. “Who are you..”

“Hey, mom!” I said “where are y’all?” Mandy and mom were driving down from Dalton that morning.

I went on to talk to mom about all the baby stuff at a house just down the street from ours on Woodbridge Lane, right past the home with the Prudential sign in the yard. I wanted to make sure they stopped by to look at it because if it was in good condition it would be wonderful for us to have for Baby Skates.

“What is it?” said my sister, Mandy, who I could hear in the back ground. “What does it look like?”

“I don’t know,” I said “It’s one of those baby things where the kid sits in the middle, and it’s round, and has all kinds of things to keep it occupied.”

“Oh okay,” said mom “We will look at it and let you know…”

“Alright! Thanks!” I said quickly, “I better go, gotta pay attention to the road, thanks mom!”

Fast forward, nine hours, Laura and I arrive home from Drew’s karate themed birthday party in South Carolina. (I will tell that story at another time.)

We walk inside and my mom and sister went a little overboard... the first thing we see is an adorable little wooden zebra with wheels that Baby Skates will love to ride one day... and a little Mickey & Minnie throw blanket. And, there it was... the colorful, round toy that I saw on the side of the road on Woodbridge Lane. But, there was something different about it... it was all taken a part! Apparently, it is a multi-use toy and can be used in many different stages.

After changing, checking email, and eating dinner Laura decides it is time to disinfect and put this thing together! I just smile and say "okay!" Knowing all good and well she would be doing this and I would be supervising from a distance.

As Laura pulls out the Clorox wipes from beneath the kitchen cabinet the dogs get all excited when the different colors parts of plastic are being brought down stairs. They have no idea what these things are and why are they in our house? I think they thought they were toys for them, but were not sure how to proceed.

This is when Logan begins her mop. She proceeds to walk over to Laura and look at her with a fond look of sadness. As she was saying

"Is this what is has come to? Are you going to give us up? I have been speaking to other dogs around the neighborhood and they say all the signs your body is going through is the sign of a baby... and well... I've seen Lady and the Tramp!"

Laura pats her leg and Logan plops herself right in her lap. Andy, very taken a-back from this, because he is "momma's little lap dog." I call him over to me and he sits in my lap while Laura cleans the blue, orange and green plastic pieces.

The bottom piece is round and bright green... Andy decides to investigate this and also feels this would be a nice place to sit!

Finally, Laura finishes cleaning and now it is time to piece everything together... after a forced snap here and there it's done!

We go ahead and start touching the buttons and making them do all their "sounds" because we need to go ahead and get the dogs used to these alien tones! The dogs sit on the kitchen floor looking perplexed and confused. I go ahead and pick up Logan's front paws to show her it's okay to touch, smell or even lick... although Laura has already disinfected everything! Andy follows in suit and they do a thorough investigation even CSI would be proud of.
We went ahead and put the toy, one day I will find out the technical term for this piece of baby equipment, in the den where it could sit so the pups could get used to this foregin object in our humble surroundings. Now all we need is a CD with a baby crying... I can't wait to see the look on their faces when that happens!

Poop, don't pee!

Not a whole lot has transpired since my lastest blog entry, so basically that is why I haven’t posted until now.

I wanted to tell you all about what happened this past weekend on Saturday. Let me set the story up for you: My sister, Mandy and my hardworking-never-put-down-the-phone mom came down to Kennesaw for the day to do some shopping and we had agreed, on Friday, if they brought Everett we would be happy to watch him while they frolicked around the town buying this and that… Laura and I were certainly happy to oblige because Everett is a fun-loving little boy who is easy to take care of. This was the first day for me to take a little boy to the bathroom in a public place. Quite a fun run-through for what is about to come. We were in a store called “USA Baby,” which is basically a condensed and more personal version of Babies-R-Us. Laura and I were walking around looking at the various things we may want to register for and after looking at bottles, bibs, strollers & diaper bags Mandy asked Everett the dun-dun-dun question.

“Do you need to go potty?”

“No.” Everett replied with a coy smile.

“Why doesn’t uncle Eric take you to pee pee?”

Everett continues to smile and shake his head no, which means in child talk, “I do need to go but I don’t wanna go right now.”

I am learning more and more I hang out with kids the in’s and out’s, although I think I am pretty far from father-to-be of the year.

So, I proceeded to pick Everett up and strut back toward the bathroom.

“I want mommy, I want mommy to do it,” Everett says in a ever-so sad and whining voice.

I thought to myself, “Do I risk a child yelling for his mommy from the bathroom in a public place or should I just take him back and hope for the best?”

I went ahead and took him back and he did his thing and everything was hunky dory, this time.

Fast forward, a few hours, Laura and I take Everett home to play with Andy and Logan, and while there Annagrace and Jenn came over for a quick and pleasantly surprised play-date, complete with bubbles! We all went outside and sat on the deck to watch the kids play with the dogs and their bubbles and that is when it was suggested to take Everett inside to "use the potty." Now, please understand we do not have one of those "little baby potties" so when I took him into the downstairs bathroom I had to hold him on the seat so he would not fall in!

"Okay Everett, time to poop," I said to him.

He just looked at me with a deteremined look on his face and low and behold he starts to............ pee!!!! No, not poop, pee! Pee went all over me, him, the floor and potty!

"No!!! Everett No! Laura, Laura help!" I couldn't help, but laugh at the situation because I knew if I looked upset it would make Everett upset and I did not want him to cry! Thankfully, Laura came running the rescue with some wips, Jenn, so conveniently, had in Annagrace's diaper bag, and some clean clothes, minus new socks let me add. Everett has a thing about wearing shoes sans socks. But, this time it was okay. (Thank God!)

"I'm sorry, Everett, but you're okay, right?"

""Yah, I'm okay," he said..."but your floor is dirty! Why don't you clean?!"

"I'm not sure, Everett, I will work on that okay?"

"Okay," he said.

With Everett all clean after the shower of pee, I asked him if he was done and he immediatly said...

"Yes, I wanna go outside!"

We went outside and the crisis of the "I wanna go home call" was averted, yet again!!!

So, moral of the story... Always have a little boy stand up and pee before he tries to poop and have some extra clothes and clean socks, just in case!

All has been permanetly burned into my subcranium... What is my next lesson? Don't know, but lets hope it is a little more sanitary!

This week has just started and I am all ready to begin the weekend… Until next time!