Friday, July 25, 2008

To spank or not to spank, that is the question!

Last night, my wife, Laura and I were sitting in bed reading when I came across something interesting in my book "The Expectant Father: Facts, Tips and Advice for Dads-to-Be, Second Edition" by Armin A. Brott. It rasied many questions that I knew Laura and I were most likely on the same page about, but just to make sure I may need to bring them up...

So, question number #1. When you come home from the hospital where do you prefer the baby sleep?

-In the book it says you must discuss this because if you differ from your point-of-view then you need to figure out your plan of action before the baby arrives.

We both totally agreed that sleeping in the bed with us just would not work. The place we both agreed upon was "The cradle" in our room.

#2. Whenever our child gets a little older and wants to sleep in our bed how do we handle this situation.

-Now this is very important because I think there should only be certain special circumstances where your child sleeps in your bed. So, that is exactly what we agreed on... There is a baby room for a reason and that is where he/she shall sleep. Of course, extreme situations veto this rule temporarily.

#3. Spanking!? To spank or not to spank...

-Well, the way I was brought up was if you do something bad, you basically are spanked. But, here is the problem... my wife, Laura, was such a good child I think she was "popped" on the behind maybe two times in her ENTIRE adolesence! However, for me, that was sooooo not the case. That is where I am afraid. I was not what you would call a "good kid" because I was always into something... I was spoiled rotten and pretty much did whatever... yet my parents were amazing parents and displined me the best way they could. My mom was the "bad guy" when it came to disipline. My dad, I do not think he spanked me, ever. Atleast I do not remember if he did. But, my mom... oohhhh my mom meant business, big time. I will never forget, if my mom went to get "Daddy's belt" I was about to be spanked on the behind. I could only run behind mamaw and papaw for so long... it was inevitable... I was getting "popped" on the behind. So, I asked Laura, how do you feel about this form of punishment? Well, she being the teacher she is, said "I feel we should utilize the 'naughty spot' philosphy first and if we are unsuccessful in that venture then that is where we can give them 'a little pop on the behind.'" So, here we are 3 for 3 in total agreement! Nice!

#4. Tantrums...

-I know this is the tricky one... and I know everyone has their own opinion on this... But, this is what we think, at the moment, so just humor me, okay? I mean when they are old enough to have temper tantrums they will be unable to actually 'reason' with you, right? I mean I know adults who have temper tantrums and still cannot reason with them!!! LOL! Okay, well, I am no doctor or child psychologist, but I figure it is hard to reason with a one year old on why he/she cannot do something or have something they REALLY want/need! So, I suggested this, we take our child away from said situation (in a corner somewhere) and try to 'reason' with them on why they should not act this way... if this doesn't work we totally take them out of the situation and head home. Now, I know this is not going to work in every situation, but we are new at this and this is what is making us think we will be AWESOME parents right now, so bare with me! :)

Oh, yes, we were in total agreement for this as well.

So, here Laura and I are, on the same page for everything so far...

Yet, every couple argues about something right?

When this happens... I will let you know ;)

<---------This is the next book I want!


Mandy said...

Good luck you two. I also did not want Everett to sleep with us but 6 weeks into the sleep deprevation I gave in. He is now 2 and he is in his big boy bed. I cant wait to hear more.

Anonymous said...

I think it is so smart of you two to be talking about all of this before the baby arrives. The more "homework" you do prior to the big event, the better prepared you will be and then, it's extremely important that you know this upfront.....just when you think you have a solid plan, you have everything all worked out in your minds.....this new, gorgeous, helpless little person will totally mess it all up for ya and you'll wonder when it was that you lost control of the situation. Kinda like Mandy after 6 weeks of sleep deprevation. :) But somehow it all seems to work out. Maybe you and Laura will always agree on proper parenting issues - wouldn't that be awesome? On a side note - I love the title of the next book you are hoping to read. Billie

Amy said...

I think it's great you guys are talking about this.

Just remember, though, when you've gone for more than three weeks on only two solid hours of sleep per night, you'll find yourself ready to do anything to get that baby to sleep.
Maybe you'll be one of the lucky few who has a baby who sleeps through the night by four weeks.
If so, I will kill both of you, and it will be painful and slow.

Anonymous said...

In advance, you two get the super parent awards! :-)