Thursday, February 26, 2009

It's never too early for Water Safety!

“Hey honey!”

Is what I usually hear from my wife when I get home from work, and this day was no exception. I drive in to the drive way, the garage door, magically, goes up and I pull in. After I basically fall out of my ’06 Black Honda Accord, I have to go through the labyrinth, that is my garage.

“We really need to get it organized sometime soon,” I say to myself under my breathe as I squeeze by my wife’s gray and slightly filthy SUV on my way to the door to the house.

“Hey sweetie!” I say as I walk in the house. “How are you feeling?”

“Oh I am doin’ okay…” she says with no hint of sarcasm. I actually believe she is feeling okay; which is a pretty nice relief considering we have been to the hospital four times now and three of those visits on Thursdays…

“I was looking through the community newsletter,” she says on her way to the kitchen to refill her glass of water. “They are offering a ‘water safety’ class! I wanna take Mauldin.”

“Oh really,” I said. “Well, when is it? What if I wanna go too? Is it during the week? How much is it? Come on now, you can’t just say you wanna do something and not back it up with important factual content.”

“I don’t know, I just read it and wanted to do it.” She said with a longing look.

She was looking at me with her beautiful blue eyes that say… I know you will say yes… Her eyes sometimes just hypnotize me and then she wraps her arms around me and snuggles… okay.. ahem…

As you can tell she makes me forget what I am agreeing to. For example, buying stuff from her sister. Her sister Jennifer has become affiliated with “Orient Expressed.” (I think that is the name of it.) It is a line of children’s clothing… anyway she had a clothing trunk show and we ended up with a couple of swim suits from this show she had... did we need these things, no. However, she wanted them for our child… so, so be it.

But, for this particular instance…the pretty blue eyes weren’t phasing me… Probably because I was so tired and when I want to be involved I tend to be more focused.

“Alright,” I said, “find out some of the info and maybe we can get signed up!”

It wasn’t because I didn’t want to take part, to the contrary.. I wanted to! But, the way things work, well, I am impatient. My wife, Laura, precedes to head over to the couch to sit down and drink her beverage. Obviously, with it being 6 o’clock, in all likliness there will be no one to answer when we make a phone call to the number on the advertisement, but when has that ever stopped me?

“I want more information about this…” I said!

“What are you doing,” Laura retorted. “Are you…”

“Hello, I would like to sign up my son for your “Water Safety” class this June.”

Well, to make a long story short… I called, found out the information, time, place, cost, etc… because I wanted and got Mauldin signed up for the June 16th-19th “Water Safety” class! Aren’t we just ahead of the game? So ahead of the game even he is the first one on the list! I mean how hard will it be for him to learn…? Hasn’t he been swimming for, what, eight months now? Anyway, I even put in to take a ½ day off at work so I can go and participate on his first day. Look at me, such the involved father.

It will be fun to see how he reacts to the pool… I’m sure I will feel like Dory from Finding Nemo: “Just Keep Swimming… Just Keep Swimming!” Or as my nephew Drew would say, "Kick, Kick, Kick!"

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

"Practically Perfect in Every Way!"

"Practically Perfect in Every Way!"

That is how I would describe the situation we are in right now with child care. We received word yesterday that Mauldin officially has a spot at an in-home child care facility.

We have found our “Mary Poppins!” Her name is Gloria and she already keeps our beautiful niece, Annagrace and my wife’s little and rambunctious cousin, Grant. She is everything we want in a caregiver and because she keeps the children at her home he is less likely to contract sickness from other little wicked chilrun’s… (no-offense to those who use commerical care, it is just not the path we chose to take.) Although, I am sure he won’t be immune to disease, but just less likely to be sick ALL the time. Please Mauldin, don’t be allergic to everything! Gloria currently keeps six children and most of which are boys. I have seen her in action and have no doubt in my mind Mauldin will be in the best care possible. (That is other than his parents ;) )If it were where we could, my wife, Laura, would stay home and keep him, but since we are not in that position we are glad he can be somewhere with other kids so he can mesh into society with no problems! LOL! Gloria’s will be a way for him to begin to make friends and learn how to be “nice” and “share,” that is while he is away from us and until he enters school. By which, I hope he has learned to be “nice” and “share” before that time!

We could of sent out an advertisement or as they say in England “Ad-vert-TIS-ment”… and I guarantee she would of flown in with her umbrella in hand!

It would probably of sounded something to the effect of:

Wanted a nanny for one adorable baby…

If you want this choice position
Have a cheery disposition
Rosy cheeks, no warts!
Play games, all sorts

You must be kind, you must be witty
Very sweet and fairly pretty
Take him on outings, give him treats
Sing songs, be sweet

Never be cross or cruel
Never give him castor oil or gruel
Love him as a son; not a daughter
And never smell of barley water

If you won't scold and dominate him
He will never give you cause to beat him
He won't hide your spectacles
Because he can’t walk
Put toads in your bed
Or pepper in your tea

Hurry, Nanny!

Many thanks...


Laura and Eric Skates.

Thank you Gloria! We are really glad to have you!

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Out-of-my mind

Vacations are an important necessity… I have discovered. It has really started to effect my wife and I that we have not been out-of-town for a while. The last time, that I can actually recall, that we were gone on a true “vacation,” was probably, oh dear Lord, I cannot even remember! I think it was before Christmas, sometime in November, before even Thanksgiving… September maybe? Don't people in Europe go on "holiday" for like, months?

Lately, where ever I go I am reminded of places I am not. My very computer background mocks me with its sandy beach and shartuse, blue-green, gorgeous water. I imagine the waves lightly crashing on the shore and the sky as blue as can be. It allures and disgusts me at the same time. My very being wants to be in a warmer climate and is ill, no, just plain sick of all the cold weather. Hotlanta, my ass.

Mauldin will actually be six-months old before Laura and I will be able to set our sights on our true vacation. We will be heading to none-other than Walt Disney World. Yes, I don’t even wanna hear it, we will be accessing one of the most populated amusement parks resorts in the world with a six-month old in tow. It seems everywhere I go I am seeing ads for WDW. I am receiving emails, I see TV commercials making me want to make an impromptu trip to the inner Orlando area… did you know they are offering three nights free when you book a four-night trip between now and August? Blimey! Although, that is sooooo not gonna happen for us.

The other day I stumbled upon my friend Jim’s blog: Busy Dad. He took his little son Fury, and some other munchkins, to the Happiest Place on Earth. Impressive man. Then we had a shower this past weekend and I discovered that my wife, Laura’s, cousins are heading there in a couple o’ weeks! It took everything within me to not cry. (*tear.)

This coming September, Mauldin, my wife and my wife’s family and I will be trekking down to the home of Mickey Mouse, Brer Rabbit and Space Mountain for a week of well-mannered and joyous frivolity! Our Grand Gathering, if you will. So, are we out-of-our-minds to take a six-month old baby? Maybe so, but Laura and I made this decision together. We could not even fathom going off to Disney without our son. It is our choice to do so and I am actually pretty darn excited about making all new memories with my little family.

When I was younger, about eight years ago to be exact, I would go on vacations probably every three months. I had the money to do so then because I was still living with my mom and dad and had no other aspirations at the time. My frivolous nature was sparked by the very reason of I had no true responsibilities. No wife, no pets, no job I really liked and, more importantly, no baby on the way. At one time, I think, no, I know, but I didn’t want to divulge this information, I went to Disney World five times in one year, ok two years (2000 and 2002). Sad, yes I know, but I had the means to do so and I loved it! There were times I went for a weekend and other times I drove down to spend a day in the park and then drove home. I would love to have that kind of stamina now… Don't get me wrong... I would never go back though because my life couldn't be any better, well... mostly because I love my wife. I couldn't dream of a better life without her in it. (Cue sensitive music) Life is good, but it can always get better, (or worse), however, if we had a little more money, a little more time off... ok I digress.

So back to the real world, the grind and the true reality of knowing I have a while to look forward to a day at the beach, by the pool or even moments with my wife in a hot tub. But, when I do get that chance it will make that time even sweeter… C'est la vie, eh?

Friday, February 20, 2009

"You like me, you really like me?"


I think, no, I know, this is my first official BLOG AWARD!

I’m speechless! (And for a blogger that is a pretty big feat!)

However, with me typing something… I guess I’m not THAT speechless!

My friend, Ed, over at “Fit Dad” was nice enough to bestow this award upon me. Thanks man!

Apparently, the award means:
“This award shows the values that every blogger shows in his or her effort to transmit cultural, literal, ethical and personal values every day.”

The rules are:

1) Accept the award and post it on your blog along with the name of the person who gave you the award.

2) Pass it on to (15) bloggers that you know who deserve it. 15? Seriously?

What about five?


Clark Kent’s Lunch Box

Busy Dad Blog

Wrapped Around Her Finger

I Have To Wipe His What?

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Breaking Water

A night does not go by, anymore, where I do not have a difficult time staying asleep.

If my wife, Laura, gets out of bed, I immediately wonder…

“Is this it!?”

I lay in the bed and hope and pray her water does not break so I am lying in a pool of her amniotic fluid. But, it may just so happen… although it would be a shame because we have a really nice KING SIZE tempurpedic mattress. I love our bed… and yes, we have put down some pads, but I’m sure when it does happen, if it were to happen at night, she would be laying up against me and not where the pad is…

I imagine, statistically, Laura will go into labor when I am NOT with her… I am at work from 8am-4:30pm, and on Tuesdays I leave from work to go to school until 10:45pm… Thursdays, I have class, after work, until 7:15pm. But, let’s just hope it happens when I am with her, but just NOT at 3am in our bed.

I know, I know… “you can’t plan it!” Although, I can hope… so leave me with that.

I have been having dreams about Laura giving birth… one dream my son, Mauldin, came out already walking… that was interesting to say the least. Laura insists he gets lower everyday, and who am I to disagree with her.. it’s her body! But, honestly, I can’t tell at all. All I can really tell is he is still in there; which is good, because we are going to be at 35 weeks this Friday! We have just a little over two weeks until he is considered full-term and after that it’s all good.

I think Laura has begun to start really wanting him to come because she is pretty uncomfortable. She wants to start getting her body back… she wants to be active again. I will somewhat agree… because it is hard to sit around the house and know we could go out and go to the movies or out to dinner, but we can’t go too far or be gone too long because she gets so uncomfortable so easy. In all honesty, I am ready to have the little bundle of joy here so we can finally see the little person who has been kicking and rolling around in my wife’s womb for the past few months. It is amazing how it has gone by so fast and it feels like just a few weeks ago we had come to the conclusion we weren’t gonna get pregnant and the next thing I know we’re out picking out various toys and bibs at babies-r-us!

So, basically we have two weeks to go… and then… if he hasn’t decided to come… we can either go to Ippilitos for Laura to have some EGGPLANT Parmesan, or… well there are ways, riiiight?

Rachel from friends giving birth…

Friday, February 6, 2009

33 weeks and going...

Today we are officially at 33 weeks...
And, here is what my wife's belly is like after 33 weeks...
33 weeks have gone by and it seems only yesterday I was surprised with a little stick with pee pee on it...

(Who knew my wife peeing on a stick could make me so happy?)

And just think... 33 weeks ago a lil' microscopic sperm found a lil' egg ... I wonder what the conversation was... I mean I am already so proud of Mauldin! He swam a lonnnnng way.... I wonder if he made some friends along the way??? Well, I am pretty glad he was the only one who made it in....

I mean was he happy he was the only sperm who made it in? Or was he like all nice about it..."you go first, no after you, no you!" Or, "Dude, you in yet? I can't seem to crack this thing op... HEY! I'm in! I'm in!"


(Hope I am not being too graphic)

Here's to a few more weeks of oven time!

My son wants to catch the worm...

It sure is an eye-opening experience when you’re sitting at your desk pretty content on doing your job when you receive a phone call expressing that your wife is on the way to the hospital because she is having contractions!!! Five minutes apart, no less. I was not sure how to even react to this news…

“It can’t be time yet,” I thought… “we are only 33 weeks along! He can’t come yet… he still has some cookin’ to do…”

I received this phone call at 4:02pm, on Thursday afternoon, and all in the next 30 minutes, I was able to call my boss, explain the situation and meet my wife, and mother-in-law, at the elevators of labor & delivery! Yes, I think I broke a few speeding laws on the way, but my mind was going 1,000 miles a minute and I almost broke down into the fetal position, ironically the very position my son is in, and swayed back-n-forth while saying… “not yet… not yet… not yet…”

However, that didn’t happen… I was able to pull myself together and be calm and chill as a 1999 bottle of white wine… (in which I was needing a glass of, bad!) That was until I got to the hospital...

On the way there...I made sure to contact my mom and sister to make sure they were aware of what was going on... "Is she okay?" my mom said in a rushed and motherly voice...

"Yes, mom, as far as I know, but when I find out exactly what is going on, I will call you back!"

I made it! Finally, after I parked, I made it inside and there were the elevators and to my right I heard...

“Hey baby,” my wife, Laura, said when greeting me at the elevator. I took a deep breath and looked at her belly. She had on a mint green shirt and gray sweatpants. I know this wasn’t her first choice of attire, but with the need to be comfortable, over chic, she obliged to comfort.

“How are you feelin’, you okay?” I quickly interjected during our embrace.

“Yeah, I’m fine, the doctors just felt I needed to be monitored…” she said, “That’s all!” How is she being so calm, I thought... she could go into frickin' labor!?!?!

I glanced over to my right, there stood my mother-in-law, Carol, she seemed as calm as could be, but I knew inside she was pretty much freaking out, but would never let her daughter see this because she knew deep down as soon as “she” looked nervous Laura would lose it. So, I took this as a cue that I should calm down as well… and honestly, how could I even really freak out because I truly could not imagine Mauldin being born on this day.. this day of days when I only had a caramel macchiato, from Starbucks, for lunch. This is Thursday, February 5th, this isn’t a day for my child to be born… this is the day BEFORE he is 33 weeks… I will not freak out because this is not the day my son will arrive to this world in his birthday suit. Besides, this isn’t the day I picked for the “pick-a-date” pool…

We walk in and are put into “triage,” which by just that word sounds scary… like we are on M.A.S.H. or something… Triage, I have only heard that word whenever we are watching a disaster movie where there has been mass destruction!!!!

After being hooked up to numerous machines, Laura is monitored as to make sure Mauldin doesn’t arrive… her contractions are still in full force, but from what I can tell she isn’t in a lot of pain. The nurse comes in to let us know Laura should be drinking atleast eight glasses of water a day… and they will be giving her a “shot” to lessen and hopefully stop said contractions. Although, they do warn, my wife, this shot may cause her to feel a little “different” for a short while. Oh, and that is certainly what happens… she starts shivering and shaking as if she hadn’t had her heroine today! (NOTE: My wife is not a junkie by any means) I had to hold her cup of water to make sure it didn’t shimmy out of her hand… There was nothing I could do, but stand there and watch… I wrapped my arm around her shoulders trying to hold her to show some sort of comfort, but she still shook…

What we do for our children.

Okay, fast forward three and a half hours and we are finally allowed to leave… her contractions have ceased… the shivering is over and her blood pressure is back to normal. So, now all we can do is wait… We certainly do not know how soon he will decide to grace us with his presence, but lets hope and pray that the lil’ guy has a little more patience than his dad because as the nurses say…

“White boys are whimpy!” He needs to wait until ATLEAST the first week in March.

Please, oh please, let him be somewhat punctual and not an early bird!!!

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Pick A Date!

Alright... it's gettin close...

the birth of Mauldin is upon us!

March 27, 2009 is his official due date... so pick the date of when you think he will arrive!

It’s all in good fun… so start guessin!

Monday, February 2, 2009

Read the fine print...

It’s the beginning of, yet another, event-packed month. February, the shortest month of the year happens to be one of my least favorites, why you ask? Well, for one, Valentine’s Day, oh St. Valentine why did you have to be recognized? I mean basically it is one of the biggest money making month’s for Hallmark and flower companies… I have never liked it, especially when I was younger… You probably are thinking “did you not get a lot of fun Valentine’s at school when you were little?” Well, if you must ask, yes, yes I did get Valentine’s, many to be more precise. But, I don't like to brag, so lets move on... That isn’t the reason for my lack of luster on this not-so-fine pseudo holiday.

Thank heavens this year, February 14th, is on a weekend so I don’t have to keep up-ing myself every year to impress… who you ask? My wife’s co-workers! You were probably thinking I was trying to impress my wife, right??? Well, heck no, I give her stuff all the time. I come home, on the very oddest of days, and bring her a couple roses or even a bouquet just to see her gleaming face of appreciation?! Yes, I do that all the time. Why? Because I usually get a kiss... and because I love my wife. I like to surprise her and keep a little bit of excitement in our relationship!

Although, on the day of the cupid, you are supposed to go WAY overboard to show up all the other husbands and boyfriends, etc… who bought their “sweetie” gifts and sent them to their wives, girlfriends, lovers, mistresses, etc… at their places of employment. The rose bouquet becomes a status symbol, if you will. The bigger the bouquet, the bigger the wallet. However, this year, I would say, the bigger the bouquet, the bigger the stupidity… who really can afford to spend $200 + on something that is going to DIE in a couple of days?

Well, not me, not me. Sorry! Not this year… I would like to be able to pay for things such as my mortgage, water bill and my son’s impending hospital bills… So, stop sending me all the FREE Shipping emails, with all the fine print! When you get to the website reads, with any purchase over $75 or more! Evil.